I was the complete opposite of a bridezilla, and had NO desire to shop around for cake. The way I was thinking, the place had to be pretty good if they were exclusive, right? My fiancé and I agreed that unless they totally sucked, we’d be going with them. I’ve mentioned the totally sketchy behavior that happened at our tasting in a previous post… that’s what led to use exploring our options.

So, we found a baker that we loved. Their cake was about a million times better than the one that was “exclusive” to the venue. No exaggeration. However, the previously-ridiculous and recently-raised cutting fee at my venue almost doubled the cost of that other baker, and we decided to give and go with the numbers. That was the second biggest mistake from our whole wedding (first being the photographer). The cake was the wrong color, ugly, looked thrown together, and tasted freezer burnt. I really wish we’d gone with the other baker.

Flash forward to now. Now I do this for a living. Those bad experiences with my own wedding cake have had a huge impact on how I do business - no freezing cakes, going out of my way to be completely open and honest with brides, striving to OVER deliver for everything, etc.

Now, the same practice that ended up with me having an ugly wedding cake in my photos also affects my business - and your ability to choose, as a bride.

From all accounts I’ve ever heard, that same bakery that screwed up my wedding cake has built their entire business on kickbacks. The brides that are strong armed into using that bakery aren’t being shoved in that direction because the place is “so good”, they’re being pushed in that way because the bakery pays for that.

I’ve been doing a lot of reading on trade law recently, as the whole arrangement smells to me. Kickbacks, fees levied against everyone but this baker.. It’s collusion. It’s definitely anti-competitive behavior, and it definitely flies in the face of a free market. Kickbacks alone are pretty illegal in many industries, why it’s apparently not here.. I’ll never know.

In a free market, bakers set their own prices, and brides choose who to use.. sometimes based on these prices. I’ve yet to read anything that suggests that venues and caterers affecting the price of bakers in such a way - to render them MUCH more expensive than their “favored” baker - is in any way “free market” friendly.

The wedding industry has long been known as seedy. Many people work against this stereotype. There are many great businesses out there who do NOT take advantage of brides, and I am always quick to refer such people. This whole blog entry .. This is the reason that I am pretty vocal about being anti-kickback. Not only do I not PAY kickbacks, I refuse to accept any - even just “thank yous”. When I recommend a particular business to a bride, it’s because that business is AWESOME. I haven’t been paid a cent to say it, nor will I. When someone recommends me, it’s because they truly enjoy the product and service I offer - they haven’t - and won’t - receive money for saying so. Both sides of this are very important to me.

Now, I’d like to sound off on my opinion about cutting fees. I’m sort of two-sided on this one.

In SOME cases, I see it as acceptable, even if I don’t agree with the terminology. If a caterer or venue makes their OWN cakes, and loses business when one of their clients hires someone else.. I can sort of understand that as being reasonable. I don’t agree with the term “cutting fee” at all - if you were to actually charge for whatever costs are incurred with cutting a cake, it would be monumentally smaller than the fees that are labeled as such.

In other cases, it’s a money grab at best, and anti-competitive at worst.

In the case of “Money Grab”.. Many caterers charge service fees on TOP of the meal charge. That meal is already surcharged like crazy - you’d never pay the same amount for the same meal in a restaurant. One would think that, in the case of a restaurant meal, you’re paying for service in that cost. For the more expensive wedding meal.. Well, you’re paying for extra service.. Or better uniforms maybe? Definitely not getting a volume discount on it either.. So why get hit with exorbitant “service fees” on top of that? At the venue I used, it was 18% of the food bill. That’s not even the tip, which is on TOP of that. EEK!

With all of that padding on price for “service”.. You’ve pretty much bought their time for the night. I don’t see cutting the cake as being something that should be charged on top of all those other service charges. If they don’t even make cake, they’re not losing business by you bringing one in, and for those kind of prices - they should be at your beck and call all evening!

UNLESS, of course.. You bringing in a cake means that they are losing a kickback payment. Then, the cake cutting fee is their way to compensate themselves for that lost money - at YOUR expense. Even if you don’t pay the fee, and go with their baker because of price, you’re still paying - you’re paying with your right to choose.

Wow, this is getting long! It’s a subject I’m passionate about though. Because I’m not one to complain without proposing a solution, here are three items I’d like to mention.

1. Negotiate! A savvy bride is an informed bride. If your venue is imposing fees unfairly - ESPECIALLY if those fees don’t apply to another bakery - Negotiate! Look into collusion, anti-competitive practices, and question your caterer about the legality of it all. Ask WHY they’re willing to “work for free” for that other bakery, if they need to charge to serve a different cake. When you hire a venue/caterer for your wedding, you are paying them a LOT of money. They can ABSOLUTELY waive that cutting fee for you!

2. The unfair practices like I’ve been talking about here were a big part of the reason we decided to adopt a referral program. I was a bit worried about doing so at first - it’s not really a kickback, but it is “getting something for a referral”. However, after many emails from brides complaining about cutting fees, we adopted this as a way around it. Earning enough referral credits in cake can offset the cost of those fees, if you aren’t able to negotiate out of them. Besides, if you’re looking to earn referrals to our cakes, it means you love them anyway and don’t NEED to be paid to recommend us!

3. If this subject riles you up as much as it does for me, you can always explore it on your own. If you’re a bride - past, present, or future - who has been subjected to practices like this, and are angry about it, get ahold of your state Attorney General’s office. Make some noise!

Getting off my soapbox now!