“You know what would be awesome…?” #4

So I was on Twitter today, minding my own business.

Well, that’s a bit inaccurate, isn’t it? The nature of Twitter and all… more like “I was on Twitter, reading about EVERYONE’S business”… anyway, I digress. I certainly wasn’t thinking I was gonna be gobsmacked by something so insanely craptacular, it would result in a blog post!

… and even less so, that it would result in a new “You know what would be awesome…?” post! Anyway. Digress…. again.

@bridetide tweeted the following: “Thoughts on this wedding cake table decor? ~ http://bit.ly/6GqsH3” For those of you unable to view the link at work, I’ll post the pic below:

My thoughts, all I could even semi-coherently put into words, were “WOW. Just.. wow”. So eloquent, I know. CakeorDeathCA put it a bit more succinctly – “Kind of .. a sin against humanity.”

I didn’t know where to start. I’m sure some of you know about the loathing I feel towards plastic fountains… but this photo really incorporates a bit of every “bad thing” I can think of, when it comes to 80s wedding decor. Balloons! Tulle Abuse! Cake staircases! Unnaturally colored silk florals! The cherry on top, of course, is that they used not one, but THREE fountains!

Closeup Cake Pic

I got to thinking.. “That HAD to be on purpose…” THEN I got to thinking..

You know what would be awesome? A wedding with “Bad 80s” as a theme. I mean “Wedding Singer”, and THEN some! To just basically go through every bad 80s nightmare / throwback, and incorporate EVERYTHING into the wedding! Think about it..

EVERYTHING dripping tulle. Oh yes. And not just white tulle.. but COLORED tulle. Like.. Fuchsia and Turquoise. Yes! To match the taffeta, pouffy bridesmaid dresses with BIG pouf sleeves and BUTT BOWS! Matching gloves and satin shoes too, of course. TONS OF HAIRSPRAY!

ALL the flowers would be dyed-to-match pink and turquoise silks. Like really cheap, dollar store variety – NOT the silks that actually look like what they’re supposed to. Except.. maybe some carnations! Yes!

The cake would have about 30 layers all over the place, and would need like 2 banquet tables to hold it all. Staircases and fountains and tulle everywhere! Turquoise royal icing roses on white! Plastic bridesmaids and groomsmen and everything. Adorning the cake table would be a ton of tulle, more plastic flowers, and… matching napkins with name/date/logo embossing on it. Maybe some personalized matchbooks, too!

OOH! And everyone can show up in 80s clothes.. the music would be fun – and really easy to decide on – oh yeah! All the stuff I’d probably wrinkle my nose at in any other situation. LOVE SHACK! Aw yeah!

Oh, I’m getting all worked up just thinking of all the possibilities! What a wedding! That would be a ton of fun. I bet it would be a lot of fun to either attend, or just to make the monstrosity of a cake for!

Actually.. man, I should talk my husband into marrying me again. I have WAY more ideas for how I’d redo our wedding, than he’d EVER humor me on, LOL. I’ll have to file this idea behind the “Go to Vegas and get married, drunk, by an Elvis impersonator” one, though.

2 thoughts on ““You know what would be awesome…?” #4

  1. “You know what would be awesome? A wedding with ‘Bad 80s’ as a theme. … I should talk my husband into marrying me again.”

    Can the cake be funfetti? I don’t know if that’s 80’s or not, but seems to fit with the bad-taste ideas you listed. 😀

  2. Auuugh… I’m not sure it’s 80’s either, but totally agree that it’d fit, regardless.

    Unfortunately, we’d have to ditch the NOM Swiss Meringue Buttercream and use that gritty, unnaturally-white grocery store stuff.

    What do you say? Add this to the list of potential re-do ideas? 🙂

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