If you follow me on Twitter – or know me in person – you know that there are many things about the current state of the wedding industry that really make me roll my eyes. Any advice the wedding mags spew about sheet and/or fake cakes usually top the list!

Today, I came across a concept so over the top offensive.. I had to post. Be forewarned, this is going to be a full out rant. It will definitely not be all “sunshine and roses”. In fact, it may be perceived as scathing. Really though, stuff like this really needs to be highlighted and openly ridiculed before it gets a chance to gain foothold as “acceptable practice”

This mind blowing concept? There is a company out there that touts its services as a way to help brides observe etiquette, by aiding in getting the thank you cards out there – and quickly. Till this point, they had me – I have really been dismayed at the way manners seem to be heading, culturally. Advocating that brides get their Thank you cards a.) done at ALL, and b.) sent out in a timely manner … well, it could only be a good thing, right?

Wrong. The devil is in the details, and in this case.. what a doozy! Basically, a bride would upload a photo from the wedding, the generic text she wants in the cards, and a database of names / mailing addresses. The company would print the cards en masse and mail them. Not only do the brides not “have to bother with” addressing the envelopes, they do not even need to SIGN THEM.

OH. MY. LORD.

The best was how the concept was presented.. suggestions like “Well, what is your time WORTH?” “You don’t want to have to bother with actually signing all those cards”, etc. I kept waiting for any sign that the presenter was aware of how ironic it was to frame such statements- and such a service – with ANY mention of “etiquette” whatsoever.. but no. None.

There is a really disturbing trend in the industry, where the invitation list comes down to pretty much nothing more than a gift grab. Invite everyone you’ve ever met, and cut every possible corner on everything to be able to invite these huge numbers of guests. Do things like have an A list and a B list.. serve proper wedding cake to some, grocery sheet cake to the rest.. whatever.. just have that invite list as big as possible. Barf.

But this? Just… wow.

“What is your time worth? Do you really want to waste all that time signing cards?”. The real question should be: What are your guests worth? Do you really value having them in attendance? Do you really appreciate the time they took to select a gift for you, and to book that day off to attend your wedding? To be there for YOU? That’s not even making mention of what money they may have spent: your gift, clothing, hair, maybe a babysitter.. yes. How much do you value your guests?

If the answer really, truly involves not valuing them enough to take a couple of minutes to write them out a personal thank you card, why are you inviting them? Is personally signing your own name REALLY that much of a hardship?

If your time is seriously that limited, and that freaking valuable that you cannot send your guests a properly signed Thank You card, then what are you doing spending time planning a big wedding? You really should just get married at a court house. Not only will it save you a TON of time, you won’t be insulting your guests by sending electronically mass produced thank yous.

I truly cannot imagine what it must be like to receive such a thank you. Where is society heading, really? Is this the next step towards sending a mass email to ALL your guests, basically saying “Hey guys, thanks for coming, we loved your gifts, kthnxbye”?