|A few weeks ago, our friend Tara invited us to her “End of the World as We Know It” birthday party – scheduled for the day after this most recent “rapture” date.
Well, we all know what happened to my husband and I the day after the LAST scheduled rapture, so I was already a teeny bit nervous about this date. Trust me, I had no idea how horrifying and twisted the day would become.
You see, our friend wanted a Cake Wreck for her birthday. As I was BEYOND finished with decorating cakes, my husband graciously stepped up to the plate.
… the man has never decorated a cake in his life.
Due to the nature of the cake theme – you know about Cake Wrecks, right? – I was woefully unequipped for my husband to get his decorating on. No, to do a cake of this wrecktitude, it would require a trip to the cake shop, and the purchase of – shudder – Wilton stuff. I’m pretty sure “Wilton” was the name of one of the lesser known fifth horsemen of the apocalypse. Yes. Pestilence, War, Famine, Death, and Wilton Fondant.
I digress. You’ll have to excuse me, I’m a little scarred at the moment. Shamed. Forgive me, Lambeth, for I have sinned – I not only bought “Tuk-N-Ruffle” (Yes, it really is spelled like that!), I USED IT. On a CAKE.
Yes, I baked and assembled the cake, filling and frosting it with a base coat of swiss meringue buttercream. I took my husband to a cake decorating supply store, and let him run wild. I let him know what was available, what things were used for what, and … that was that. This wreck was all his, and I was NOT to give any design direction.
There is nothing more adorable than a fully grown male geek with ADD, let loose in a cake decorating shop. Nothing. There are just so many funky things that can be put on a cake, many of which are hilarious and/or horrifying. Usually unintentionally so! He was like a kid in a candy store!
He spent the evening before his big decorating debut in research mode. He looked through the cake wrecks website, read the advice from some of our Facebook Fans (“Write instructions on the cake!”, “Misspelled words!”, “Have writing trailing off the side of the cake!”, etc). He spent some time reading the Engrish.com website for inspiration.
As you can see, he turned out a respectably bizarre and disturbing cake. Naked babies riding carrot torpedos right at a surrendering chick in a corset top. Creepy clowns looking up from the side of the cake with their dead-yet-sadistic gaze. Apostrophe abuse. Instructions. Misspelling.
During the decorating process, there was a lot of giggling. There was a lot of less than sane/mature/SFW commentary. As we’d recently picked up a little camcorder, we decided that this would be an excellent excuse to make a youtube video. Check out the Youtube Playlist of the whole process. Don’t say I didn’t warn you about the immaturity, NSFW-ness, etc 🙂
Somehow, I don’t think Food Network is going to be offering us a show anytime soon.
But… The birthday girl loved it! Happy birthday, Tara!