Back in the beginning of March, I received an email from one of my tweeps. She excitedly told me that w00tstock was coming to Minneapolis, and “I don’t know about you, but I think w00tstock would be better with cake!”

Well, I had to agree, so I got a hold of Paul and Storm, the geeked out musical comedians in charge. Offered up some cake, they were interested, mentioned I’d have my husband – a photographer along with me to take pics… they asked if he’d be willing to be the official backstage photographer (Willing? Hell YES he was!)…
and we were on track for an adventure in epic geekery!

The plan was to make a surprise “Tardis” cake for Adam Savage & Wil Wheaton. Hubby would photograph the goings on, while I doled out samples of our caffeinated brownies and blondies (from our line of baking mixes. Cake would be served, geeking out would occur, and it would be an awesome night.

Monday was the day, finally! It had been difficult to not blab the details of the cake design itself, while I had been free to tweet that I would be DOING a cake. Everyone wants to know what it’ll look like, especially when it’s a.) Geeky, and b.) Intended for geek royalty! This blog entry is gonna get long and image-heavy, so click through to read & gawk!

The day got off to a bad start. Due to some dropped communication between the various parties involved, we ended up cakeblocked at the last minute. The Guthrie decided – between the time we left, and arriving at the loading dock – that 1″ samples would be too much competition for their concession stand, and we were left with 600 samples we could not serve. Damn!! Woulda been good to be told that – we briefly considered a tweetup sampling out of the back of our truck. LOL.

We loaded up the dolly with everything else, and set about to get the cake discreetly delivered to a room where Wil Wheaton wouldn’t see it. Of course, he was one of the very first people we came across. While a few people tried to guide him away from where we were, there were a few tense moments as we tried out best to stand in front of / conceal out delivery. My minion of the evening – Rachel – and I set about setting up our merch booth, while my husband went on the photography gig he’d been looking forward to awhile.

At that point, the rest of the evening kinda became a flurry of activity, so let me just point-form our highlights. This probably won’t be accurately chronological in any way!

- It was great to meet SO many of my tweeps! Thank you all for coming by the booth and identifying yourself as such! Kaji, TheGreenAvenger, PerpetualMind, NorthernGypsy, off the top of my head… hi!

- At one point, Wil Wheaton warned my husband (as the photographer, not knowing he was in any way related to me or the brownies backstage) that the brownies may taste really good, but watch out – they’re REALLY caffeinated!. Wil later told the story to me as well, saying that a little bit of one had him feeling like.. damn, I can’t remember how he put it. Like a hyper chipmunk or something. He was talking very fast

- Minutes before the big unveiling, I was told in no uncertain terms that Wil would “lose his shit when he sees the cake”. He did. It was great! Here are some pics:

(What happens when you present a geeky cake to a room full of geeks!)

For more pics of the cake & backstage presentation, check out our Facebook page – fan us while you’re at it!

- I took a really crappy cell phone pic of Wil on the floor, photographing his cake. Cake Wrecks retweeted it… Wil tweeted pics.. both (with a total combined follower number of 2,889,949!) including my username… and my twitter feed went apeshit. Here’s a more pro version of the Pic I tweeted:

(Being married to a photographer is handy!)

The cake, if you don’t recognize it, it the TARDIS from Dr Who. What made this cake really cool – and a stand out for my husband – is that the light on top was not only functional, it blinked. That meant a trip to Ax-Man – his favorite store in the world – as well as ripping apart a few different lights/components, and making custom electronics for it. He was in his glory We let Wil keep the blinky light!

Another interesting thing about the cake was the inside joke we piped on the back. If you follow either Wil Wheaton or Paul and Storm, you know what that’s all about I’m not describing here, as I don’t want to attract certain types of spam comment bots!

- Being approached by a friend of mine who’d seen Twitter just blow up over the cake – and all of the high-profilers tweeting about it – and the first thing she said to me was a rough quote of a local “bigshot” (in her mind) planner who told a friend of mine that I have no idea what I’m doing, that by catering to geeks and doing stuff like having Klingons as escorts at an Awards Night (see Here and Here, and Here), I was – quote – “throwing my business down the toilet”. Ah, sweet, sweet vindication. I’d actually forgotten all about that until the friend brought it up. I was very smug after that reminder, LOL.

- While he wouldn’t OFFICIALLY “bust the myth” of fondant tasting bad, (oh, how I was hoping for video of that!)… I was told that Adam Savage liked my fondant, and was totally unaware that fondant has a bad rep.

- We met two of the guys from Thaco! While hubby was photographing Wil with his cake, I went over to inform him that I noticed Bill Stiteler in the corner. You should have seen his grin! He loved that movie.. and had the “claim to fame” of being Thaco’s first review on Amazon. As Bill pointed out, that’s their ONLY review… so if you’ve seen it and loved it, go review it already! (That’s a totally unsolicited request/recommendation, by the way!)

Actually, I should be more accurate. Hubby met one of the Thaco guys, I met two – Duck came up to my booth. I have NO idea if he wanted info or anything, cause I immediately asked “Are you the guy in Thaco?”, and when he confirmed, I may have sort of screeched excitedly about my husband being a big fan, and asked for a photo with which I’d torment him. He graciously allowed it Hubby WAS jealous, just as I called it.

- Hubby had a GREAT time photographing the whole thing. His highlights included getting shoved on stage a few times to take pics, looking out on the audience and seeing a bunch of people he KNEW. That had to be pretty cool… we really did end up knowing a TON of people in attendance, too!

- You see this couple? They got engaged at W00tstock! On stage. I didn’t get to see it personally (was at my booth!), but I hear it was a geeked out moment of beauty! They later told me, at my booth, that my cakes were one of the first things they thought about after getting engaged. What a compliment! It was also cool for my husband, who was “shoved out on stage” to capture the moment. I think it’s the first engagement moment he’s been a part of, aside from his own!

- Speaking of couples getting married, guess who stopped by my booth? Check this out:

That’s a crappy cell phone pic I took of one of my favorite couples ever! They were actually anonymously “famous” that night, and have been for awhile – they’re Cory and Tori, the couple who ordered the Super Mario Brothers wedding cake for their wedding a year and a half ago! You know, the one on the front page of my site, and on most of my advertising… the one that something like 90% of the attendees at W00tstock geeked out over? Them! Awesome to see them again – and doubly awesome that he was wearing a Super Mario Bros shirt for the pic!

- We got a hell of a shoutout on stage from Paul and Storm. I’m used to very dry “we’d like to thank our sponsors” kinda mentions… this was nothing like that. I knew they were excited about the cake and enjoyed it, I didn’t expect it would come through SO much on stage. I was very honored.. and luckily, quick enough to capture most of it on video:

I CANNOT tell you how electrifying an experience it was when they crowd went SO nuts over the pics of the cake. I have goosebumps just typing about it. Thank you SO much, all of you. You made my night!!

- On the subject of unexpected ego boosts, holy crap – I read the comments on the cake pic Wil tweeted. Awesome, check it out!

- Being surrounded by not only almost every geek and nerd we know – which is ALWAYS a good time, we were surrounded by geek royalty, which was really cool. Wil Wheaton, Adam Savage, Paul and Storm, as mentioned.. but also several “Mystery Science Theater 3000″ guys there: Trace Beaulieu, Bill Corbett, and Kevin Murphy… authors John Scalzi, and James Kakalios – who I’m told COMPLETELY brought the house down with his Physics talk. (Twitter sure went nuts!), and more!

- I got to meet Neil Gaiman! I had gone back to the green room to look for my husband, poked my head in to ask for him.. where Neil was the one to answer. Neil thought that he knew where he was, and very kindly led me back. Very gentlemanly… and he actually contributed to my most surreal moment of the night. He stopped, turned around and extended a hand, and said “I’m Neil Gaiman”. Like I had NO idea who he was! Kinda caught me off guard.

I’ve met and/or worked with many celebrities over the years, and I’m pretty sure he’s the first to ever introduce himself. Many/most just expect it’s a given that I know who they are, even when that’s NOT the case – sports stars are particularly guilty of this. (Ironically, I’m usually quite guilty of not having a clue WHO they are!). I follow him on Twitter, as a result of SO many of my friends talking him up.. even though I’ve not had time to read fiction in.. wow, maybe a decade? He was just such a down to earth and nice guy! I think I’m gonna have to seek out one of his books and give it a go, as soon as I have a minute to breathe! (so probably end of July, by the current looks of things!). Any recommendations?

- As part of the show, artist Len Peralta (of the Geek A Week project) was on stage, seated at his computer… designing the official W00tstock poster. They set it up so that the audience could tweet suggestions as to what all should be on this poster… and yes, my Tardis cake ended up on it! How sweet is THAT? Thanks Len! You rock.

Wow, this entry is long and crazy. Trying to think if there was anything else?

Oh! At the end of the night, when the Geek Royalty was lined up at a table across the room, signing autographs.. 4 or 5 people came by my booth with their autographed poster.. and asked for MINE! Signed em and did a quick “Tardis cake” sketch. Fun!

All in all, a crazy awesome night!! What were your favorite memories of #w00tstock ?

Hi there. I know that you and I have a weird relationship at times, so I think it’s about time to get some things out on the table with you.

First off, know that I’m not 100% against you. There are some beautiful things about you, that I admire. Some great, honest vendors that are a blast to work with – or just hang out with – who love what they do, are great at it, and take pride in making an honest living. That all is great, and I’ve never had an issue with it. So, that aspect of you.. this letter isn’t directed at you.

There’s this other part of you, the part that I don’t get along with. A big part of it is a lack of understanding. I just think we’re on totally different wavelengths. To be honest, it sometimes feels like you’re this inbred, greasy used car salesman cousin that I’m *supposed* to like/get along with, just because of some tangential, distant relationship. I’ve never subscribed to that sort of thinking even with blood relatives, so you’ll have to understand that it’s extra hard for me to relate to you in business.

We have to share the same air – and the same culture, market, contacts, etc – so I’d love to reintroduce myself, lay some ground rules, and hope that we can come to some sort of understanding going forward.

To all businesses, new and old: Realize that I’m my own person, and I do things my way. It may not be the way that anyone / everyone else does things, but that’s just how it is. Specifically:

- Understand that no, I do not exchange links with someone I have not worked with. For that matter, I don’t exchange links with someone I have worked with, unless I’m absolutely confident that they are an awesome vendor. Please realize that this is not up for debate. I really hate being made to feel like a douchebag, but I will say no to any requests from new businesses / anyone I haven’t worked with.

- Referral fees. Oh, this is a never ending source of annoyance. I don’t care how you choose to label it, I will never pay any sort of fee for a referral. I am a staunch believer in only referring the people that I trust / like to work with / do a great job / are honest / etc. As such, I would never accept payment for a referral either. I place a high value on the fact that my brides can trust that anyone I refer is *great*, and that I have no hidden motive for referring. This is something I am not willing to compromise on, period. To be quite honest, when offered the “opportunity” to pay to be on a “preferred vendor list”, I find it not only personally insulting, I see your business in a different light. I like doing business with businesses that have their brides’ best interest in mind when referring, not just “these are the vendors that have given us money”. It just smells really dishonest to me.

- If your email to me contains any “text speak” at all (unless used in a HIGHLY ironic way, intentionally), or is riddled with spelling and eye-gouging errors in basic grammar… I may not even respond to your email. Please show enough professionalism & respect to use spell check software if it’s a weakness of yours. That goes double for your website.

New Wedding Planners: Boy, you can really tell when there is an economic downturn, as the market gets flooded with wedding/event planner upstarts. Please understand this to be the (long standing!) case. You’re going to really need to work to stand out, and to earn the trust of established vendors. If you, yourself, are a newlywed, you’re going to need to work at least 2x as hard as other upstarts – if we had a dime for everytime we heard “I had so much fun planning my wedding, I decided to do it for a living”.. a lot of the wedding vendors out there could retire on the spot.

New Wedding Photographers: You have the same sort of flood working against you that the wedding planners do. Realize that many wedding vendors are totally inundated with emails from upstart photographers. It does get a bit annoying at times. If your website is professional, and your work is good, you’ll catch our eye. If you offer to work at ridiculously discounted rates (or free) to get your foot in the door, I roll my eyes and delete your email. If you want to be a pro, be a pro. If you want to be a volunteer, or to get practice.. weddings are NOT the venue to do it.

New Wedding Shows: First off, I don’t do wedding shows at all, sorry. It’s my own personal idea of hell, and really – it’s never been a good match for us. Most of our brides do not even attend shows. I do know a ton of vendors that are looking for shows to do, and would be pleased to pass your info along, if it looks like a good match. Lately, however, I’ve been getting a *ton* of promotional packages for new shows in the mail. If I’ve never heard of you, and can’t find information online… and if you obviously have very little marketing planned for, I’m not passing your info along. It’s sad, but I’ve seen a bunch of upstart shows as “a quick way to make some $”. Also, if you’re a show I’ve never heard of, and the organizer is an upstart photographer or wedding planner I’ve never heard of.. that goes double for you.

Wedding Websites: Wow, there is a new wedding website cropping up every 30 minutes these days, I’m sure of it. I could rant for days, but let’s keep this short and sweet. I straddle the line between Gen X / Gen Y, I’m a techie.. and I have a great understanding of how SEO works. The vast majority of emails I get from you are for eyesore sites, not at all that google-friendly, and feature GROSSLY inflated pricing. As an upstart, I am well aware of the fact that you need us wedding vendors *far* more than we need you, so please don’t expect us to spend hundreds of dollars on your beginner site, and please stop filling up my inbox. kthnx.

So… that’s just how it is. Those are my ground rules, take em or leave em. Ah, it felt good to get that off my chest, it all had to be said.

Truth be told, dear cousin.. I hope you clean up the aspects of yourself that I don’t like. In the meantime, I’ll be perfectly content to pick and choose, and just deal with the aspects I get along with and can enjoy.

Ciao!

It’s a long standing thing for me, I remember failing a project back in fashion school over my views. We were asked to write a paper on.. jeez, I think it was it meant to be “in style”. I wrote my paper on my own views – that to be really stylish, one should embrace their personality, appearance and go with what works for them. That it shouldn’t matter if a certain color is “so last year”. That if that’s the color you look best in, wear it, rock it, own it… look and feel your best, and THAT is what it means to have style.

Yeah. My instructors and I didn’t really see eye to eye on that at all.

All these years later, I find a constant stream of information on color trending for weddings. Purple, it seems, is the hot color for 2010. If purple is your color, whether favorite to wear or to see, or your favorite flowers happen to be purple.. hey, more power to you!

What I’m wondering is.. how much do brides really follow these trends? Do people really put aside their “favorites” to meet a trend? I swear, whenever I hear “(color) is the new (color)”, I throw up in my mouth a little.

Of course, this trend forecasting does have an inpact on availability of wedding related items. If your absolute favorite color was popular 2-3 years ago, it may be difficult to find a good selection of bridesmaid dresses in that color this year. It gets even worse when picking out tuxedo rental accessories, as they tend to be available in an even smaller selection of colors. Between that, and all the features written about trendy colors for weddings, I can see how it would be easy to give in and go with the flow.

Here’s the thing with trends, as I see it. Trends are dated, time sensitive. Look back at the 80s.. bright fuschia and teal taffeta, big pouffy sleeves, and butt bows were hugely trendy. How many 80s brides look back on their wedding photos and DON’T ask themselves “what was I thinking”?

Weddings are an amazing vector for personal expression. For most people, it is not only the biggest party they will ever throw, it will be the most detailed. Most people will never spend that much time selecting color choices for wardrobe, decor.. floral choices, menu, stationery, and everything, into one complete package. It’s a once in a lifetime thing.. so why let something as fickle as the fashion industry dictate what you want?

No matter what you see on the blogs, in wedding magazines, or on the racks… there are always options. Have your bridesmaid gowns custom made – it’s not always a more expensive option, and it ALWAYS gives you ultimate control! Not only can you choose the exact fabric colors and textures you truly love, you can have the gowns cut to really flatter your best friends. Not everyone looks amazing in whatever the cut-of-this-year happens to be (see pouffy sleeves and butt bows!). Be nice to your bridesmaids! Not only are they your best friends… they may ask you to be a bridesmaid for you in a year when “mustard yellow” is the hot new thing. Ew. Best to build up some karma points now!

The same thing goes for your own wedding gown. Do you have a style you love, that you’ve always dreamed of getting married in, and looks great on you? If you’re a “mermaid” style gal, and this year happens to be ballgowns (as an example.. cause I really have no idea what’s “in” this year, nor do I care!).. you rock that mermaid gown. So pastels & tiny flowers are in when you get married, but you love deep dark jewel tones and big, statement-making stargazer lilies? Go for it! I can all but guarantee you that none of your guests will be thinking “Ugh! Doesn’t she know that stargazers are SO last year”. .. and really, if they are.. your friends are losers.

To quote/paraphrase the ever-wise Madonna.. “Don’t go for second best… express yourself!”. No matter what the industry dictates, personal favorites are never “out of style”. Going with what you love will NEVER lead you to regret years later.

Never feel forced to use – or NOT use – a particular item, style, color, or whatever when it comes to your wedding. It’s your day… own it.

Bit of a spoiler – it’s not getting judged till Saturday, but I’m confident in declaring that we’re all getting our asses handed to us by Gateaux. Seriously. I’d recently heard a rumor that Robin from Gateaux had sold her soul to the devil. DEFINITELY starting to believe that one. (Though, when I asked her about it, she did tell me that the devil actually sold HIS soul to HER… that may explain MORE!).

Anyway, I HAVE to post photos! It’s been killing me to keep my theme and pics all hush-hush before the competition.

So, here’s the deal. In the course of our brainstorming: “What are our favorite foods?” “What would make a kick ass cake?” “What would be funny/different?”, etc.. we got slightly off track and thought maybe to look to other media for inspiration, rather than just restaurants and grocery stores. Any songs that feature a food theme? How about movies?

Well, at the suggestion of food related movies, one of us popped off a quote about Liver, fava beans, and a nice Chianti (there may have been alcohol involved in this brainstorming session).. and AWAY WE WERE. An idea that we were virtually GUARANTEED that no one else would think of, much less actually use: A Silence of the Lambs Cake

Like I mentioned in my latest blog entry, I honestly did float a few other ideas by a WHOLE BUNCH of people, a little part of me thinking I should probably be talked down from this idea. Nope. Bunch of enablers! Love em!

So, I set about working on all the fussy little details.. a bottle of Chianti (in the traditional style bottle!).. sugar “death’s head” moths, painted in cocoa… liver & fava beans out of fondant.. a fondant “radish rose” and sugarpaste sprig of basil for garnish… a fondant plate, gumpaste cutlery (all airbrushed with edible metallic silver luster!).. Hannibal Lecter’s mask.. and a brain. Muahaha!

(Editted to add – Been asked about the size a few times. The “man” is actually life sized, everything else is also “real” sized. The moths are about 5″ across, the cutlery all proper sized.. it was a monster of a cake!)
I will shut up and post photos now!

Obviously not a traditional interpretation of a “Food and Wine” themed cake, but hey.. Looking forward to seeing what the audience and judges’ reactions will be!

It was that kind of thinking that was behind my Tremors themed wedding cake, for the Chocolate Show competition. The theme was animals, I’d been looking for an excuse to make a Tremors cake… grabboids are animals, right?

Anyway, if you follow me on twitter or are friends/fans on Facebook, you know that I’ve been preparing for the “Czar of Cakes” Challenge at the Minnesota Monthly Food & Wine Experience. The competition involves 6 local cake companies: Celebration Generation, Muddy Paws, Gateaux, Jessica’s Cakes, Queen of Cakes, and .. that other one. Only real rule is that the cakes have to be food / wine themed.

It took me well over 3 weeks to settle on a theme! We started with an initial brainstorming session, which produced 3 reasonably great ideas, and one “spectacular.. but has NO chance of winning, may get us escorted out, and probably will prevent us from ever getting invited back!” idea.

I tried to get into my competitors heads, when it came to weeding through the ideas. One theme was one that I could see Jessica doing, for instance. Another was one that I could see Gateaux doing. The 3rd was a really sweet idea that I definitely couldn’t see anyone else doing.. but I got really attached to the “spectacular but crazy” idea. Didn’t help much that the vast majority of my friends – in several different circles – are also kinda crazy and weird, and are enablers. LOL. Crazy idea it is!

I just put the finishing touches on the cake, and I’m really excited now! We’ll be posting photos on Saturday, can’t wait!

Don’t get me wrong.. I have nothing against love, affection, showing appreciation for those you care about, romance, or whatever. I’m just not big on feeling forced to do anything, or ads that seem to.. well, encourage romance by way of guilt. Jewelry ads that seem to tell guys that they don’t really love their girl if they aren’t willing to express it by buying a “REAL stone” are particularly great for getting some eye-rolling time in!

Nope, I’ve always preferred the “Do something nice for my hubby, cause he deserves it / he had a rough week / *I* had a rough week / I feel like it / Saw something or had an idea that made me think to / etc way of romancing my hubby.

That said, the market really does get hit with an awful lot more “romantic” gift items this time of year, and I’m REALLY impressed with some of the ideas I’ve read about on Twitter, come across online, etc. Of course, I procrastinated WAY too much to actually order any of these for this weekend, but they’re all too cool NOT to share! Consider this partially my “fantasy Valentine’s Day wish list”, and partially me spreading some love to people/companies that I like!

First off, ThinkGeek.com is an amazing one stop shop for Valentine’s Day, IMHO. They have cool products year round, of course.. but major kudos to them for their VDay lineup! My Favorites:

Valentine’s Day Box of Mini Plush Microbes!
This was actually my #1 gift wish (to give OR receive!) this year, and actually would have been able to order in time, but they were sold out till this morning. Bah. Cutest thing ever! Admittedly, probably best for someone with a certain sense of humor – I’m sure some people would take offense at getting a heart box full of plush venereal diseases*. I, however, think it’s awesome! Click here for all of the details.

Plush Beating Heart – It’s adorable! What else is there to say? Click here for all those details

They have a ton of cool items.. check out their Valentine’s Day Gift list Here.

Next up, gotta give some love to my Twitter buddy, Geeky Clean. Sure, there are a million and one soap companies out there, and I’m sure many, many are just fabulous.. but she’s got a unique, awesome product. You know how it is. Nerd solidarity!

“Sexterity” soap
I’m not even into RPG, and I think this is awesome. “peach, cherry blossom and white jasmine” sounds amazing, and come on – super cute idea. My hubby is a reformed gamer, this would be perfect for him. You know, if I didn’t steal it for the scent! Also FTW: “Swine Flew” bacon scented soap and pretty much everything else they make.

I think their soaps would make amazing guest favors for any nerdy or geeky wedding, party, shower, or whatever – and she will do custom packaging! Mental note: Blog more about this later!

Now here is a company I recently found on Twitter, and I am COMPLETELY blown away by the talent here. I mean really, disgustingly talented. He carves fake pumpkins like this:

K, everything I said about no guilt Vday? 1 exception: Oh wonderful husband of mine, I know you’re reading this.. you know, if you *really* love me, you’ll totally order me a custom carved pumpkin, featuring Hugh Jackman as Wolverine. Claws out, preferably featuring him in a tank top. Thanks! *mwah*

You can follow this ridiculous artist on Twitter HERE, btw.

Pumpkins a stretch for Valentine’s Day? Not in my mind.. and hey, it’s my blog! So… there.

Ah, the love continues! My favorite radio station just played Nek’s “La Vida Es”, which I think is the most romantic song ever. Maybe I’m mentally ready to celebrate this weekend afterall, feeling warm and gushy after the song.

How are the Mr and I spending Valentine’s Day, you may wonder? This year, we decided to have fun with it: White Castle, Boone’s Farm, and B movies. Cause that’s just how we roll every once in awhile

* I get a kick outta the way people talk about “VD” on Twitter, much in the same way I snicker when brides discuss their STDs. (”Save the Dates”, for my non-wedding readers!) Mature, I know Gotta take your entertainment where ya can, right?

Then I get ADD and forget about it.

I received the BEST request on Twitter the other day, and had to share:

From @chebutykin: Hey @Celebr8nGenr8n , if I decide to host a end-of-the-world party in 2012, would you create a Aztec temple/human sacrifice cake for me?

Oh hell yes!! Kinda sucks that 2012 is so far away, this is exactly the kind of cake / event I can totally geek out over. My next “Klingon Bird of Prey” type of epic awesomeness. Yes!

@chebutykin received a response from one of her followers almost immediately, and it made me smile:

From @dmann11 : @chebutykin please…dear god, let her say YES. Also related: Stealing the idea.

I love twitter!

There is a certain cake company out there – who shall remain nameless here – who has the nasty habit of outright lying about the offerings of their competitors. I’ve never understood why – they have their fingers in everything, pretty much saturate the market, and really have nothing to fear from small, boutique custom cake outlets like my company.

I’d like to clear up some of their statements, as told to me by a prospective client of theirs:

1. “You don’t want to do the outside of your cake YELLOW! (Yes, she very much did want a yellow cake) It can look GREEN under some lights!”
Sure, it can.. if you have green lights shining on it. Blue lights, even. Why anyone would do this as a default is beyond me, but whatever. Bizarre reasoning for trying to talk someone out of their dream cake. Sure, any cake can be made to look any color with external lights… that’s why it’s always good to have your cake area well lit. You know, with something other than green/blue lighting (unless that’s what you want!).

2. “If you do any color other than natural colored, it will stain your guests’ teeth for 2 weeks!”
Uhm, no. At worst, you may stain them until the next day, but that would be under extreme circumstances. Let me elaborate!

- Color that is incorporated *into* fondant will not stain teeth, period.
- Most colors that are incorporated into buttercream will not stain.
- Black or very, VERY dark colors incorporated into buttercream *may* stain teeth, but only for a very short while. This is assuming that a large amount of the colored frosting is eaten – piped accents will not do it.

So, it’s not the best idea to frost the entire outside of a cake in a deeply colored buttercream. Oh well! Fondant is an excellent alternative, and as a side benefit, will keep your cake moist and fresh!

3. “Fondant is (insert disparaging remark of choice here).”
Can fondant be nasty? Sure, if you buy the wrong one. Is it appropriate to blanket all fondant with that label? No. Click here for a past blog entry about fondant, which explains everything.

4. “It’s bad to color frosting, because coloring is UNNATURAL!”
The most amusing thing about this statement is that the bakery that makes this claim bakes their cakes from mixes – you know, full of unnatural stuff!

Here’s the deal. While there are plenty of people who would like to keep certain dyes, etc out of their diet, it takes only a very, very small amount of coloring per serving to achieve any particular color. Definitely not harmful in the slightest!

When coloring fondant, even less color is needed, and fondant is easily peeled off to avoid the dyes if necessary.

Finally, there are many NATURAL food dyes available. Frosting can be colored with anything from berry juice/extracts, to beet juice, to squid ink. Not wanting to deal with “unnatural” ingredients really is no excuse to just avoid color altogether.

More power to them, though. Personally, that’s not what I’m about, so we service very different brides. I just wish that they’d stop misinforming brides about products, techniques, and their reasoning behind not offering. There is nothing wrong with color or fondant!

I believe that every bride should have the option to have the cake of their dreams, regardless of what that is. Color, fondant, crazy, elegant, whatever – without being told lies about why they “don’t want that”. As a cake vendor, if I come across a bride whose dream cake is something that I don’t really do (fountains, stairways, whatever!), I’ll refer them on to someone who does. It’s not my job to change their mind on what their dream cake is – it’s my job to facilitate that. EVEN if it means passing them on to a caker that is a better match for their dreams!

This particular idea was to write a bit of a rant about bogus industry awards. A big topic to bite in to, but I ultimately decided that it would probably be snotty, and kind of offensive. Put the idea on the backburner.

Today, I received a sign that I *absolutely* had to go ahead and write that bit of snark fest. At least, I choose to see it as a sign. Your mileage may vary, of course

A bit of backstory here: A few weeks ago, Twitter and the blogs just lit up with wedding industry folks congratulating themselves on winning the “Bride’s Choice” award for a certain wedding planning site. I mean the tweets got so prolific, it really did rival the last 20 mins or so of that football playoff game recently. Seemed like everyone and their dog won the award.

I, however, did not – and that was a factor in deciding to forgo a blog entry. Thought it may come across as sour grapes. Anyway.

The thing is, there really wasn’t any judging or standards involved with this “award”. I know, I was one of the million or so ‘winners’ last year. I believe last year, you had to have 4 reviews on their site that were all better than 3/5 stars, or some such criteria. Thing is, my brides don’t tend to visit that site, I feel lame asking for reviews… so I really haven’t had any reviews since. I have received exactly 1 review there in the past year and a half! No big surprise that I didn’t win.

Did I feel bad? No. I understand the nature of the “award”, and it really amounts to some smart advertising for that site. Once a year, they notify pretty much everyone that they’ve won this “award”, and – being human – everyone gets excited, announces the news, and puts the little award graphic on their site. Linked, of course, back to this wedding planning site. Very quick and easy way to not only increase their exposure and traffic, but to seriously impact their search engine ratings. Smart – and sly.

Amid all of the tweets about winning, there were a few voices of reason. Click here for one blog entry that made the rounds last week, albeit for a different site. (Same idea, though!).

All this backstory, right? Anyway, the sign (cue Ace of Base..)? One of my cake tweeps mentioned that the both of us are apparently on this list of ‘winners’ (*chortle*), though neither of us received notification about it when everyone else did. I did go to the site to confirm. Sure enough, right at the top of the list of ‘winners’ – pretty much EVERY cake company in the cities – was Celebration Generation. Woot?

I won’t be bragging about it, I won’t be pasting a link to the site, or their little “Bride’s Choice” banner, because I don’t play that game. There are an awful lot of games in this industry, and I’m just not into that crap. Does refusing to play the game hurt me at times? Sure.. ask me about the local mag that actively badmouths me. Why? Cause they had me do a custom fake cake for a photoshoot, then lied about one of the other cakes involved, in such a manner as to disparage the use of fondant.

I’m sorry, but if you bash the use of fondant, claim to never use it because it’s “so horrible”, then do ALL of your advertising featuring fondant cakes, AS WELL as photoshoots.. you’re a big hypocrite. If, as a magazine, you know all of this, yet knowingly caption the cake as having been – let me quote here – frosted with their signature buttercream, for the look of fondant without the gummy texture”, I’m going to call you out on it. It’s called having morals. Yes, that was all from memory, from a year ago – I was mad! Why mislead brides like that? Oh yes, because this cake vendor is a prominent advertiser. Sure. ARGH!

I digress, again. “The game” is something that’s annoyed me for a very long time, you see.

In other, more local news, a local wedding mag is currently soliciting votes for their “best of”. Please don’t vote for me. I have no interest in that particular popularity contest at all. I can’t wait for the voting period to be over, as that’ll be when all the emails, evites, FB messages, and tweets begging for votes will end. It’s not a whole lot different than the site I described above, only this one actually involves voting.

The problem, however, is that it really has nothing to do with the quality of anyone’s service or product. You don’t have to be a bride, or even ever have been a client, in order to vote for someone. It’s a popularity contest. The cake category in particular is particularly bogus. All of the top cake companies in the state handle a VERY SMALL AMOUNT of cakes on any weekend… yet are pitted up against companies that can do upwards of 60 weddings in a week.. and it all comes down to a vote? Yeah. That’s quality right there.

That’s not to say that all awards are bogus. We were so thrilled to win the 2008 ICON award, as that had been judged by pros. I cannot tell you how thrilling it was to know that Sylvia Weinstock herself had decided my little company to be the best of the best. Exhilerating! We didn’t win for 2009, but that was completely ok with me. When Gateaux won, I was legitimately bested. An honorable loss is alright by me! I’m happy that we were nominated, an honored to be included in such great company. ISES also has a juried award, and I’m sure there are more out there. Judged awards > phantom standards, or “whoever can wrangle enough votes from whoever”.

I could rant for hours, but I’ll try and wrap it up. In summary, treat any “award” you see with a big grain of salt. Yes, that’s a nice, succinct summary right there.

Today, I came across a concept so over the top offensive.. I had to post. Be forewarned, this is going to be a full out rant. It will definitely not be all “sunshine and roses”. In fact, it may be perceived as scathing. Really though, stuff like this really needs to be highlighted and openly ridiculed before it gets a chance to gain foothold as “acceptable practice”

This mind blowing concept? There is a company out there that touts its services as a way to help brides observe etiquette, by aiding in getting the thank you cards out there – and quickly. Till this point, they had me – I have really been dismayed at the way manners seem to be heading, culturally. Advocating that brides get their Thank you cards a.) done at ALL, and b.) sent out in a timely manner … well, it could only be a good thing, right?

Wrong. The devil is in the details, and in this case.. what a doozy! Basically, a bride would upload a photo from the wedding, the generic text she wants in the cards, and a database of names / mailing addresses. The company would print the cards en masse and mail them. Not only do the brides not “have to bother with” addressing the envelopes, they do not even need to SIGN THEM.

OH. MY. LORD.

The best was how the concept was presented.. suggestions like “Well, what is your time WORTH?” “You don’t want to have to bother with actually signing all those cards”, etc. I kept waiting for any sign that the presenter was aware of how ironic it was to frame such statements- and such a service – with ANY mention of “etiquette” whatsoever.. but no. None.

There is a really disturbing trend in the industry, where the invitation list comes down to pretty much nothing more than a gift grab. Invite everyone you’ve ever met, and cut every possible corner on everything to be able to invite these huge numbers of guests. Do things like have an A list and a B list.. serve proper wedding cake to some, grocery sheet cake to the rest.. whatever.. just have that invite list as big as possible. Barf.

But this? Just… wow.

“What is your time worth? Do you really want to waste all that time signing cards?”. The real question should be: What are your guests worth? Do you really value having them in attendance? Do you really appreciate the time they took to select a gift for you, and to book that day off to attend your wedding? To be there for YOU? That’s not even making mention of what money they may have spent: your gift, clothing, hair, maybe a babysitter.. yes. How much do you value your guests?

If the answer really, truly involves not valuing them enough to take a couple of minutes to write them out a personal thank you card, why are you inviting them? Is personally signing your own name REALLY that much of a hardship?

If your time is seriously that limited, and that freaking valuable that you cannot send your guests a properly signed Thank You card, then what are you doing spending time planning a big wedding? You really should just get married at a court house. Not only will it save you a TON of time, you won’t be insulting your guests by sending electronically mass produced thank yous.

I truly cannot imagine what it must be like to receive such a thank you. Where is society heading, really? Is this the next step towards sending a mass email to ALL your guests, basically saying “Hey guys, thanks for coming, we loved your gifts, kthnxbye”?